Topic: Mothers (a
great topic for Mother's Day)
Prepared by Michael Krigline, MA
(2007) www.krigline.com
Teachers
(or others who want to know how I use this in an English Corner): see
below.
Notes: a quote is something in quotation
marks (“ ”) to show that it is exactly what someone wrote or said. The
smile (which looks like this on this page:
:) )
shows that a quote is funny (at least to Americans). This symbol
�:)
comes before discussion questions.
General quotes:
:) “If your parents never had children, chances are you won’t, either.”
Dick Cavett, US comedian
“Sooner or later we all quote our mothers.”
Bern Williams
�A.What
did your mother like to say often? Did she have a favorite saying
or 成语?
“Never marry a man who hates his mother,
because he'll end up hating you.” Jill Bennett
“Don’t call me an icon. I’m just a mother
trying to help.” British Princess of Wales Diana (1961 - 1997) (icon
= someone famous who is admired by many people and is thought to represent
an important idea)
�B.
These quotes tell us that our mothers have a big impact on our lives, even
long after we have grown up. Princess Diana called herself “just a
mother,” which shows that even famous mothers sometimes don’t realize how
important their role is. Tonight we will look at many more quotes, which
will help us discuss motherhood. Feel free to ask if you need help
understanding some of these quotes. I’m sure someone in this group can
help translate if necessary.
1. What is a mother?
:) “Children aren’t happy with
nothing to ignore,/ And that's what parents were created for.” Ogden Nash
(1902 - 1971) US poet & humorist
:) “God could not be everywhere, and so he made mothers! --Jewish proverb
“A mother is not a person to lean on but a
person to make leaning unnecessary.” Dorothy C. Fisher (1879 - 1958)
�A.
Tell us one way that your mother helped you to “stand up” or become
independent.
“A mother is the truest friend we have,
when trials, heavy and sudden, fall upon us; when adversity takes the
place of prosperity; when friends who rejoice with us in our sunshine,
desert us when troubles thicken around us, still will she cling to us, and
endeavor by her kind precepts and counsels to dissipate the clouds of
darkness, and cause peace to return to our hearts.” Washington Irving (meaning:
When bad things happen, or when good times turn to bad times, or when
friends leave us because of some trouble, a mother is our truest
friend—she sticks by us and her words help the trouble go away so that
peace can return.)
�B.
According to these quotes, a mother is your truest friend, someone who
teaches children to stand on their own, someone who can “always be there
for you,” and someone most of us ignore. Which quote do you agree with or
disagree with the most?
�C.
American TV personality Oprah Winfrey said, “Biology
is the least of what makes someone a mother.” If “biology” (i.e., the
ability to give a child birth) alone doesn’t make someone a mother, what
does?
�D.
What do you like or dislike about
this next quote, and can you explain what the author means? “The moment a
child is born, the mother is also born. She never existed before.
The woman existed, but the mother, never. A mother is something absolutely
new.” Rajneesh
2. Is motherhood a difficult job?
“Sometimes the laughter in mothering is the
recognition of the ironies and absurdities (荒谬).
Sometime, though, it’s just pure, unthinking delight.” Barbara Schapiro (meaning:
both crazy and joyful situations can make mothers laugh)
“Being a full-time mother is one of the
highest salaried jobs... since the payment is pure love.” Mildred B.
Vermont
:) “My mother had a great deal of trouble with me, but I think she enjoyed
it.” Mark Twain (1835 - 1910)
�A.
Did your mother “have trouble with
you”? Did she see this as a challenge or a problem?
“At work, you think of the children you
have left at home. At home, you think of the work you’ve left unfinished.
Such a struggle is unleashed within yourself. Your heart is rent.” Golda
Meir (former Israeli President) (meaning: a mother has two
jobs that tear her apart, and she is always being pulled by either her
work “job” or her family “job”)
“The central struggle of parenthood is to
let our hopes for our children outweigh our fears.” Ellen Goodman (1941 -
)
�B.
What are some of your mother’s
“fears” for you? What are her “hopes” for you?
�C.
Do you think motherhood is a
difficult job? Why or why not?
3. Does our relationship to our mother
change over time?
:) “A man loves his sweetheart the most, his wife the best, but his mother
the longest.” Irish Proverb
:) “When a woman is twenty, a child deforms her; when she is thirty, he
preserves her; and when forty, he makes her young again.” Leon Blum
“A mother never realizes that her children
are no longer children.” Holbrook Jackson (1874 - 1948) English
journalist, editor, author
�A.
Does our relationship to our mother
change over time? Is that good, bad, or something in between? Explain your
answer.
�B.
William Dean Howells (1837-1920 US, author) said,
“A man never sees all that his mother has
been to him until it's too late to let her know he sees it.” What have you
learned about your mother in the last two or three years? Have you let
your mother know what you have learned? Why or why not? If you could say
one thing to your mother right now, what would it be?
4. How to be a good parent:
“The art of mothering is to teach the art
of living to children.” Elain Heffner (2003)
“Children need more models than critics. A
pint of example is worth a gallon of advice.” unknown (meaning:
a child’s ears hear mothers complain and give advice, but a child’s
eyes learn by watching how their mothers live)
�A.
What is the difference between what
our mothers tell us (to our ears) and what they teach us
(show to our eyes)? Which is more important and why?
“This is part of the essence of motherhood,
watching your kid grow into her own person and not being able to do
anything about it. Otherwise children would be nothing more than pets.”
Heather Armstrong, Dooce, 11-15-2005 (meaning: you want your
pet to always obey you and be near you; mothers watch children become
independent)
�B.
Pearl Buck (who grew up in China;
1892 - 1973) said, “Some are kissing mothers and some are scolding
mothers, but it is love just the same.” Is your mother the kissing
kind, the scolding kind, or something else? Which is best?
�C.
Jill Churchill said, “The most
important thing she had learned over the years was that there was no way
to be a perfect mother and a million ways to be a good one.” What are some
of the “million ways” to be a good mother?
5. On the impact mothers have on their
children:
“A child’s life is like a piece of paper on
which every person leaves a mark.” Chinese proverb
“The mother's heart is the child's
schoolroom.” Henry Ward Beecher
Poem: “You may have tangible wealth
untold;/Caskets of jewels and coffers of gold./Richer than I you can never
be -/I had a mother who read to me.” Strickland Gillilan
(meaning: you may have a lot of money but you can’t be
richer than me because I have something even more valuable—a mother who
taught me to read)
“All that I am or hope to be I owe to my
angel mother. I remember my mother's prayers and they have always followed
me. They have clung to me all my life.” US President Abraham Lincoln (1809
– 1865; He was born in a log cabin
in Kentucky and raised in poverty by his father and step-mother.)
�A.
One of these quotes said that the
greatest thing his mother did was to read to him. Why do you think he said
this?
�B.
What would you say has been your
mother’s greatest impact on you? How has she influenced you the most?
6. What characteristics do mothers have
(good and bad)?
“The heart of a mother is a deep abyss at
the bottom of which you will always find
forgiveness.” Honore' de Balzac
:) “A mother is a person who seeing there are only four pieces of pie for
five people, promptly announces she never did care for pie.” Tenneva
Jordan (generosity)
“Few misfortunes can befall a boy which
brings worse consequences than to have a really
affectionate mother.” W. Somerset
Maugham
:) “A smart mother makes often a
better diagnosis than a poor doctor.” Dr. August Bier (1861 - 1949) German
surgeon (nurse)
“A mother understands what a child does not
say.” Jewish Proverb (perceptive)
“Mother
love is the fuel that enables a normal human being to do the
impossible.” Marion C. Garretty
“The success of
love is in the loving; it is not
in the result of loving. Of course it is natural in love to want the best
for the other person, but whether it turns out that way or not does not
determine the value of what we have done.” Mother Teresa of Calcutta (meaning:
love is not about results, love is about doing good things for others no
matter what the result is)
“Love, to be real, must cost, it must hurt,
it must empty us of self.” Mother Teresa (selfless)
�A.
Say these characteristics after me:
forgiving, generous, affectionate, perceptive, loving, selfless. These
quotes say mothers are all of these things, plus medical experts. Which of
these characteristics does your mother have—give us an example if
you can.
�B.
Are there other characteristics that
your mother (or a mother you know) has? Explain.
7. How has “women’s liberation” helped
mothers/women?
:) “The best thing that could happen to motherhood already has. Fewer
women are going into it.” Victoria Billings (meaning: it is
a good thing that some women are choosing not to become mothers now that
they have other career choices)
“Many men still regard women mainly for
their beauty and entertainment value (singers, dancers, models, movie
stars, etc.), but today's liberated women at least don’t have to walk on
bound feet and share their homes with multiple wives. Maybe our daughters
will finally achieve the equality that our mothers could only dream
about.” Anonymous
“Women do not have to sacrifice personhood
if they are mothers. They do not have to sacrifice motherhood in order to
be persons. Liberation was meant to expand women's opportunities, not to
limit them. The self-esteem that has been found in new pursuits can also
be found in mothering.” Elaine Heffner (meaning: liberated
women have many opportunities to find jobs that make them feel valuable,
among which are motherhood)
�A.
How is motherhood different today
than it was in your grandmother’s time? Are the changes good or bad? If
there have not been enough changes made, what still needs to change?
�B.
Let’s define mothering as
being a full-time mother instead of also finding a paying job. Do
you think modern women should still be allowed to make mothering their
only career, or should all adult women have outside jobs? Explain your
answer.
8. On the important role mothers play in
society:
“Our greatest natural resource is the minds
of our children.” Walt Disney
“Let France have good mothers, and she will
have good sons.” French Emperor Napoleon Bonaparte
“My mother was the most beautiful woman I
ever saw. All I am I owe to my mother. I attribute all my success in life
to the moral, intellectual and physical education I received from her.”
First US President, George Washington
�A.
How important do you think a mother’s
role is in society? (take a vote: not very important, important, very
important). Why?
�B.
Which is more important to shaping us as children, our schools or our
parents?
�C.
The world has many criminals. Do you think this is because they had
inadequate (不充足) parents, inadequate education, weak minds, poorly chosen
friends, an inadequate cultural environment, or something else?
�D.
John Erskine said, “Woman in the home has not yet lost her dignity, in spite of
Mother’s Day, with its offensive implication that our love needs an annual
nudging.” (meaning: we don’t need a special day that pushes
us to love our mothers) Obviously, he didn’t think that having Mothers’
Day was a good idea. Do you agree or disagree, and why?
�E.
What should society do to strengthen the role of mothers and the value of
motherhood?
Sources include:
http://www.quotationspage.com
http://quotations.about.com
http://www.creativequotations.com
Note: A quote's original source is not
always known, and authenticity has not been verified.
To find out about an author, type the
name into the Google search box on my home page.
Note to teachers or
English Corner leaders:
This guide was created for use in China,
but could be adapted to any group of English-learners. To lead this
discussion with more than 10 people, I encourage you to train students in
advance to lead subgroups. A few days before the large "English Corner,"
go over the quotes and questions with your "leaders" and answer their
questions. Those below "band 4 level" will have difficulty with the
language, so encourage the leaders to simplify the quotes or to present
paraphrases. Then, when leading the larger English Corner, I present the
first section as a large group discussion, and then we break into smaller
groups. My student-leaders ask the discussion questions and try to get
answers. Then members of the group read the quotations, say what they
think each one means, and/or ask questions. After 15-20 minutes, we all come back together, get feedback on
what the groups discussed, and then encourage participants to find a
different group to join.
This resource was created for our students under my
understanding of "fair use" for educational resources.
Prepared by Michael Krigline, 2007 (www.krigline.com). As far as I am concerned, people are allowed to print/copy
it for personal or classroom use.
(see Website Standards and Use Policy)
